Why Sensitive Men are so Appreciated by Shannon Garza

Why Sensitive Men are So Appreciated

HSPs make up about 20% of the population. You would think, with that number, there would be more men who speak up about having this trait.

After all, according to current world population statistics there are about 800,000,000 HSMs (Highly Sensitive Males).

Where are they though?

It may be hard to find them as they may not know about the trait, or if they do, they may be embarrassed to claim this trait. It’s not a trait that’s very kind to men.

As you know men have been taught to believe they need to be tough. To not show their emotions. Well, that’s just ridiculous. Why would we have emotions if not to express them?

This lie is spread so far and wide that boys grow up believing they need to “be” a certain way, a way that is harmful to them. Some of them grow to be troubled men, turning to drugs and alcohol to numb their feelings, leading to failed relationships.

I grew up alongside some sensitive males and I’ve seen how they’re molded to be thick-skinned.

I’ve witnessed first hand what this belief has done to our sensitive boys. Without the proper nurturing they can easily turn to a life of crime, drugs, and alcohol. Numbing their feelings, avoiding confronting them. They do all they can not to feel all those intense emotions.

Not all Sensitive males turn to destructive behavior.

Some turn to art or outdoor activities. They find a way to express themselves without feeling less of a man. They have accepted, or are working on accepting their trait and educating themselves on how to cope and thrive with it.

In addition to learning to toughen up many highly sensitive men go into the wrong fields. They will do jobs that are traditionally male in nature. Construction, landscaping, welding, plumbing and other “male” driven jobs or careers. In these cases sensitivity is pushed aside for the more accepted stereotype of a “strong” male.

In reality many industries benefit from the sensitive male. Consulting, writing, nursing, therapy, acting and much more. When there is a good balance of strong and sensitive then businesses grow and relationships thrive.

The sensitive male is a great find.

They have that masculine energy, reason, action, adventure, protectiveness, that is needed in a relationship but they also have the capacity to listen and understand and relate to you fully. They can feel what you’re going through.

Being understood by your sensitive father, brother, friend, cousin, uncle, son, or partner makes for a supportive, healthy relationship.

If it weren’t for the sensitive male, I’m not sure where I’d be. I appreciate them so much. They bring such a balance to the masculine energy. The things they do or say are thought out carefully. Rarely are they careless in their words or actions.

When the sensitive male recognizes another sensitive, male or female, they click so well. They know how to listen, to help someone feel seen and understood.

They bring compassion to the situation at hand. Our thoughts matter to them and their actions are powerful. What the sensitive male brings to relationships brings a good balance to life. Without them the masculine energy would be too intense.

Sensitive males can see the light through your darkness and be a guide through tough times. Their strength inspires us. Their sensitivity comforts us. They bring color into our lives and are appreciated more than they know.

Instead of telling our boys to toughen up we need to show them how to navigate their emotions.

Hopefully this generation of sensitive men can teach other, younger sensitive men their trait can be a benefit to them. That it can help them to go far in life.

To see more deeply into the needs of themselves and of others.

To lead them in the direction of their dreams.

There are many sensitive men out there but only a few who are willing to be public about it.

How do you feel? As a male has your sensitivity been a benefit or a burden?


Pic credit via Katerina_Knizakova


Shannon is a Highly Sensitive Person and an Introvert. She is a coach for Highly Sensitive People. She is an advocate for breaking the stigma on mental health. She loves laughter, kittens and helping people live their best lives.


  • Cliff Harwin

    My high sensitivity has been a benefit once I understood myself better. I’m motivated to better myself everyday. Lifelong learning is a priority in my life.

    I hope to aspire to the many positive things that you mentioned about highly sensitive males.

    • Shannon

      That’s so wonderful Cliff. Life long learning is the best way to perceive it. It takes the pressure off of having to know right now. Just learn from the every day things that take up space in our lives.

      I’m so glad that your sensitivity is a benefit now. I bet it has opened up your creative mind, I know it did mine. I’m learning to focus on the benefits of it. It’s a bit of work but so worth it. And if I may say you have been a great benefit to the HSP community. 😊

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