“You look great! You look good!”
I’m new to finding a Therapist and I’m sitting across from a Psychiatrist I haven’t met before.
I’ve just related what therapies I’ve been researching that I think would be helpful. Her response is a comment, her opinion, on my physical appearance. How I look.
She has no idea apparently that I’m a master of illusion. I’ve had to fake “looking” normal my whole life. I have that down pat.
When you get to know me better you find out I have a dry sense of humour. And I’m not at all normal. I’m quite weird actually.
Weird but not crazy.
My eyebrows rise while my eyes squint slightly.
Uh oh. Am I dealing with a psychiatrist who may be slightly crazy? Or is this some type of new therapy?
I listen as she talks. I’m feeling like a football player in a locker room before a big game and the coach is firing up the team. Am I the team?
One strike you’re out.
After I get home I research this Psychiatrist and learn she has an extremely low client rating. A lot of complaints. Huh. Maybe it’d be a good idea if I check the doctor out before wasting my time next time.
“Why did you change your hairstyle and colour?”
I’m sitting across from another Psychiatrist I’ve met once before, and again, I’ve just related what therapies I’ve been researching that I think would be helpful.
Again, with the appearance stuff.
“I felt like it. Does that have anything to do with what I’ve been asking you about?” I ask politely.
His eyes squint, the corners of his mouth pull down slightly and suddenly I’m looking at the top of his head while he begins busily scribbling in his notebook.
Apparently that wasn’t the response he was looking for.
By the end of the session I realize this particular individual has a Napoleon complex.
My General MD wants me to get tested for ADHD. I know I don’t have ADHD. But, I don’t know for sure so I go. Turns out, no, I don’t have ADHD. But the Psychiatrist kindly offers me an anti-depressant prescription.
Alright. That’s three Psychiatrists I’ve seen. I’m batting 0-3.
But I’m not giving up. No way.
Because I’ve done a bit of research and I’m convinced that a set number of sessions (because no, I don’t plan on going to a Therapist for 7 years thank you, if we can’t figure this out in under 6 months I’m out), and it feels right to me that finding the right therapy and a therapist that’s a good fit for you – that’s what works.
And medication without therapy? Not interested.
I do some more research.
Since learning I have the HSP Trait about 3 years ago, I also learned that it can be more of a detriment for an HSP who grew up in an unsupportive environment, which I did, and then after following my own spiritual path and its related bumps along the road as an adult, I’ve often thought what I could be experiencing is PTSD or Complex PTSD.
And guess what? Depression and anxiety are symptoms of PTSD.
In the past I’ve read the symptoms of PTSD and happily checked off the boxes with tick marks. But I thought, so what? So what if I have that? Nothing can be done about it right?
Nope. Turns out I was wrong.
So I find an amazing Therapist who has training in Accelerated Resolution Therapy. I instantly vibe with her and find out she too is an HSP.
And guess what?
After one session I can happily report this is amazing!
The kicker is that if you have the HSP Trait you get a double bonus – because this therapy relies on you using your imagination as part of the therapy.
As we all know, creativity and an abundant imagination is something HSPs are not in short supply of – they have fantastic imaginations.
After one session I’m feeling lighter, more at ease, more open and yes, happier.
Don’t get me wrong. There’s work involved, work like; meditating, breathe work, a forgiveness and gratitude prayer, exercise and eating as healthy as I can. That stuff is my daily homework, because the majority of the work I do with my Therapist is the work I do on my own.
Finding the right therapist hasn’t been easy. It’s taken me about 9 months to find the right therapy and the right therapist for me. But I’m like a pitbull with locked jaws when I know what I’m doing is what I’m supposed to be doing.
Was I surprised by the quality of care of Psychiatrists?
But guess what? Psychiatrists are no different than anyone else. There’s good mechanics, and bad mechanics. There’s good plumbers and bad plumbers.
The thing about psychiatrists and therapists is – humility, patience and compassion aren’t taught in school. Those are life learnings and while it may be attributes we erroneously but automatically assume a therapist or psychiatrist have, some don’t.
But as they say, keep at it, don’t give up, and the turtle wins the race.
I’m curious – do you have a funny, weird, or inspiring Psychiatrist story?